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In Support Of Gum Control
Chew On This!
Billy had fallen asleep with a wad of Bazooka chewing gum in his mouth. In the morning, before diving into a bowl of Grape Nuts, he stuck it on the front page of the newspaper, right on the photo of the president who, in the photo, actually did have a wad of gum on his forehead
That photo of the Leader of the Free World with gum on his forehead managed to bounce around the front page of the New York Times every single day since it was taken. With the election weeks away, the editors were spinning opinion pieces with titles like “Now We Gum Him”.
The photo was taken during a press conference after one reporter, implying collusion, pointed out that both he and the Russian president chewed gum.
In response, the president arrogantly took the wad of gum and stuck it to his forehead. “Is that better? Now please report that I am making America the greatest bubble ever.”
While his approval rating have gone up and down over the years, his loyal followers always stuck to his heels.
When he talked the Ukrainian government to flip their nation’s flags colors upside down, with the slogan “When…
